Embracing Darkness
by Starlit Skyline
Summary: The Darkness is a constant echo in the back of your mind - sweet, alluring and deadly.
1. Black and White

Hey people, it's been a while since I wrote something for this fandom. This is basically an idea that popped into my head a few weeks ago, so I hope you like it... don't forget to drop me a review at the end!

Black and White

The first time it happens, I wasn't expecting it.

The first thing I see when I open my eyes is darkness, it stretches out all around me, a dark void encasing me on all sides. Nothing exists here but me and the winding tendrils of smoke veiling my surroundings. It's not a welcoming sight . I look around frantically as I feel panic rising inside me. But there is nothing here, no escape nor any light to guide me. I'm alone - a dot of colorful light amidst a sea of shadow.

"Back again, are we now, Tsubasa?" Well, not alone, at least not completely. My other self emerges from the mist, but the shadows still cling to it, painting it's colors in a more sinister shade. It's malevolent gaze locks with my own and it grins. "Aren't you going to say hello? It's been such a long time since we've seen each other, after all." it complains, like a child being denied it's toys. It's an obnoxious, arrogant thing, but it's still my shadow, it's still _me_ - no matter how much I wish to deny it.

It laughs at my unease "Disgusting, am I?" it chuckles "But, my dear Tsubasa, you're looking at a mirror! " it laughs again, the harsh sound echoes eerily in the smoky emptiness. The statement rings true, but the mirror is distorted and cracked, twisting the image it reflects beyond recognition.

My Darkness is still smiling at me and the expression sends shivers down my spine. It's planning something, like a predator playing with a mouse. "Nay, Tsubasa, how are those _friends _of yours?" It asks suddenly. "Especially that little, annoying one - Yuu, was it?" my blood runs cold. Yuu's been living with me for the past couple of months, ever since the World Championships. That little ball of hyperactive energy has really brightened up the gray apartment I call my home.

His room is just down the hall, just a few paces away from mine.

"You won't touch him!" I snarl out viciously.

My Darkness only smirks "No, but _you_ will." It says it like it's some kind of promise.

"When will you get it, Tsubasa?" It asks in mock-disappointment. It's hand is suddenly clutching my cheek, eyeing me appraisingly "We're the same." It leans in, whispering softly in my ear "I'm you."

I wake up in cold sweat, clutching my sheets in an unrelenting death-grip. My breathing is heavy, my eyes are wide - but I don't see anything. My thoughts are still stuck in the nightmarish realm I call my mind. The moonlight streams in from the gap in the curtains and suddenly I can't stand the shadows of the night anymore. I stumble out of bed, tracing the wall until I find the light-switch. When the light-bulb blinks to life, it's too bright for me to see anything.

I blink - once, twice and the world changes from blinding white to oppressive shadow every time. The room slowly comes into focus, like an artist had began to sketch in dark coal over a white canvas. I can't wait any longer.

I make a wild dash down the hall, and two seconds later I'm in front of my flatmate's door. In a moment of indecision, I debate actually going into the room. Finally, I gingerly turn the doorknob and poke my head in.

It's too dark to see anything clearly, but I can still discern the small figure sleeping in a tangle of blankets and fluffy animals.

"Five more minutes, Tsubasa. " Yuu whines into his pillow, his voice a sleepy murmur "It's not even light out."

I smile, my frantic heartbeat calmed by the familiar scene. "Goodnight Yuu." I whisper and softly close the door behind me. I lean against the wall, watching the faint glow of the night-light seeping trough the gap beneath the door for a few seconds. Reassured, I descend into the darkness of the hallway yet again - the shadows of my room don't seem as dark anymore.

* * *

The second time it happens, it's a feeling of déjà vu.

It's Friday and me and my friends are all at Madoka's workshop. I'm having a friendly match with Benkei, while Yuu and Kenta wait their turn. Gingka is bugging Madoka about one thing or another and Madoka is trying to keep her cool and focus on her work. I'm not surprised when I hear her yelling half-a-second later. Kyoya is bragging about his beyblading skills, but he's too absorbed in his tale to notice that no one is really listening.

"Eagle!" I call out my special move, planning to end the match in one swift blow. Unfortunately, Benkei was expecting this and his bey side-steps at the last moment. Eagle lands in the center of the stadium and Benkei uses the opportunity by circling it to gain momentum before attacking. Eagle has wasted a lot of its' speed on my last attack and I know I won't be fast enough to dodge, but if Benkei gets a direct hit then it'll surely throw Eagle out of the stadium. I'll lose if I don't try to dodge.

I feel a pang of frustration - Benkei shouldn't be able to beat me this easily!

I open my mouth to command Eagle to dodge, but a sharp pain in my temple stops me. I gasp, one hand griping my head. The world drains of its' colors, smoky tendrils veiling everything but the two beys in the stadium - one speeding towards the other. I see it as if in slow motion. I'm not going to win this battle.

Benkei is cheering on the other side of the stadium, already celebrating his victory. I'm not fast enough to escape. I'm not strong enough to take a hit. I'm weak. I'm pathetic. I'm going to _lose._

But... I don't want to lose. I'm not worthless. I'm not pathetic. I should be strong. I should be able to win, so why aren't I? If I pride myself on my knowledge of strategies, why didn't I deflect such an easy trick? How can I call myself strong when I can't even beat someone as weak as Benkei? Why am I so helpless? "Yes," a seductive voice whispers "That's what I'd like to know."

The world snaps back into focus so fast it , makes my stomach lurch. My head is still throbbing when I raise it to see that a bey has been knocked out of the stadium - it's Benkei's.

I stare at it, frowning, before my gaze shifts to the center of the stadium, where Eagle is still spinning in a blur of purple.

* * *

The third time, I'm so paranoid I don't even see it coming.

I'm walking through a forest, searching for a place to set up camp. I've always liked the outdoors, it's much better than the stress and hassle of the city. I used to do it to relax, now I do it to get away from my friends. We've grown distant in these past couple of weeks, mostly because I do my best to avoid them and make an excuse when they invite me over. After a while, they've stopped asking and I don't know whether to be relieved or disappointed that they did. Still, it's better that I stay away - for now, at least.

The sun is setting, I should get settled soon, it isn't wise to wander at night here.

I search high and low, but I don't find a suitable place to settle down. The trees are too close for me to make a fire, but there should be a clearing up ahead.

The sun sets over the trees and the forest is plunged into darkness. It's eerily calm and there's something unnerving with the quiet surrounding this place. The only sounds are the leaves that crunch beneath my feet, unnaturally loud in the silence. I suddenly wish for my friend's ruckus and noisy voices. It's too calm, too quiet.

The hairs on the back of my neck raise as dread and panic fill my chest. A branch snaps behind me. I turn so fast that my own hair ends up giving me whiplash, but I don't notice. My eyes are locked on the swirling, disembodied mass crawling it's way towards me. The slimy, dark creature is slowly taking shape, it body twisting into a new form. I don't want to see what it will become.

Turning back to the path, I run.

Somehow, I know I'll never run fast enough to escape, but that doesn't stop my feet from tearing down the path at break-neck speed. I hear the creature coming, lurking somewhere behind my back.

My breath is coming out in short gasps, I'm beginning to exhaust myself - but there's no light at the end of the road to give me any hope of salvation, just the looming branches of trees hanging over my head, obscuring any light that the stars might gift me.

This all seems a bit too familiar, I know - which means that if I manage to reach that little pinprick of light that the darkness seems to have swallowed, I'll be safe. Just _don't turn around_. The darkness is behind me and I want to keep it that way. I don't want it getting close again nor taking over. I'm done with that, it's behind me.

It's dark, so I don't see the root sticking out of the soil beneath my feet. I fall, hitting the ground with a resonating thud and a grunt. Hurt courses through my body, but I don't have time to sit around and wait, it's going to catch me if I don't move. Whipping around on the floor, leg still throbbing, I half-expect it to be pouncing on me any second now - but I realize with a sense of both hope and dread that it's nowhere in sight.

An eerie chuckle echos around me, seeming to come from every direction. "You'll come to me, in your most desperate times Tsubasa, just like you always do." A image of Benkei doing his special move flashes in my mind's eye. I shiver.

The purple hue drains out of the shadows and my Darkness' presence fades away with it - but even though I can't feel it in this precise moment, I'm all too aware that it's still lurking about the recesses of my mind.

* * *

A month later I'm fed up with everything, scared and my own dark thoughts won't leave me alone. My friends, on the other hand seem to be glowing with happiness every time I see them - though those instances are becoming rarer and rarer. Ignorance is bliss, and they have plenty of it - but they aren't as blind as I take them to be. Some caught on my charade quickly, while others took a lot of time to notice my off behavior - but the ones who saw my troubles didn't particularly care, or didn't know how to respond to them. The ones who did try to help were all to easily swayed by my hallow reassurances and fake smiles. They all thought it was some trivial matter that was bringing me down, nothing serious. After a few months, they began to worry - but none of them did anything drastic.

By this time I decide to take matters into your own hands. I'm searching through the confidential files on Hikaru's computer one night, long after both she and Ryo had left for home. I can't tell Ryo about the lingering Darkness - obviously, since his solution would probably be to lock me up in a mental hospital. I'd like to think he'd have a bit more understanding this time around, but I'm fairly certain even team Gan Gan Galaxy wouldn't have any objections if they knew I still had darkness inside my heart. I frown, that was stupid of me, everyone has darkness inside their hearts... mine just seems to be bigger than everyone else's.

I shake my head, it's late and I'm not making any sense with my self-loathing and pity. I glance at the digital watch on the computer's screen. _2 A.M.,_ it reads.

I'm tired, but I make no move to leave. I haven't found what I'm looking for yet.

Three hours later, when the sun is already peeking over the horizon, I find the information I'm looking for in a folder in Hikaru's personal documents. I'm not sure what to make of that - either she thought it was a good place to hide it or she was extremely paranoid, probably the later.

The footage is from a small restaurant in Singapore. It shows a tall, write-haired teen in black and white clothing as he walks in. I grin, the first, real grin I've made in months. Bingo.

* * *

I sit at a table in the back corner, the waitress has already warned me that a regular likes to sit there, and that he'd probably make me move. I reassured her that it would be fine and waited. Sure enough, fifteen minutes later, a familiar face comes into the restaurant.

Ryuuga's steps are menacing as he makes his way to the back table, most likely because he noticed his favorite seat is taken. When the other boy is close enough, I look up from my newspaper, peeking at him behind the brim of my hat. He pauses, features lax in confusion, before he smirks.

My disguise isn't much, just a change of clothing and my hair bundled under a hat. It isn't much, but then again my intention isn't to hide.

Ryuuga sits across from me, still smirking, haughty as ever. It should be annoying, at least a little bit, but somehow it isn't. I'm too tired to care, anyway.

When the waitress comes to ask for our orders, we still haven't said a word to each other. Ryuuga orders coffee. I order tea.

"So," Ryuuga starts conversationally, still wearing that smug smirk of his. I think he's grinning like an idiot more than anything else. "What brings you here, Tsubasa?" he drawls my name out in the way he knows he'll annoy me most. I'm unfazed, however. It doesn't matter any more.

"I'm sure you can guess." my voice is monotone and bleak and I register distractedly that Ryuuga's smirk has fallen off his face. For a long moment there's nothing between us but an empty silence and hard stares. Suddenly, Ryuuga breaks into a grin.

"So we've finally passed the point of denial, have we?" his grin widens "'Baut time."

I glare halfheartedly at him, but I don't do anything more than that. A hand suddenly cups my cheek from across the small table. I wonder dimly why Ryuuga loves invading a person's personal space. "Aw, little Tsubasa, don't be like that," Ryuuga whines childishly "You can't just give up now that things have gotten interesting." there's something slightly sadistic in his eyes when he says that, but I'm not intimidated anymore. Ryuuga can give me the peace I want, I don't care for anything else.

"Huh, you're no fun when you get all brooding, little Tsubasa." Ryuuga says, releasing my cheek.

"You have an annoying similarity to my Darker half." I comment in slight irritation.

Ryuuga's face seems to be stuck in that stupid smirk of his, but unlike Yuu's or Gingka's or even Kyoya's there's no happiness in it - just sadistic pleasure. Once, it might have made me uncomfortable. It certainly did make me uneasy in the forest after battling Julian in Italy, but now I just can't bring myself to care.

"Half?" Ryuuga asks offhandedly "implying that you still haven't come to terms that it's actually _you."_

The answer is instant, almost automatic "It isn't."

Ryuuga sighs dramatically "And here I was thinking that you actually made some progress."

* * *

My friends think I'm on vacation, I think I've gone made.

The market place Ryuuga is leading me through is lively and full of people. The two of us stick out among the crowd - many passer-by give us strange looks, curious and wary. They look away when I or Ryuuga meet their gazes, like they've been cough doing something they shouldn't. They don't look again, but I guess that has something to do with Ryuuga's death-glare.

My eyes roam over the various stalls, the people flowing through the crowd and the children playing in the streets. The sounds of bargaining voices, chit-chat and women gossiping fill the air.

Ryuuga stopped abruptly and I almost run into him - almost, but I manage to avoid the collision. Ryuuga growls at me anyway. I sigh, exasperated, and look over his shoulder to see why he stopped.

For a moment I don't see anything that would make the older teen stop, just shoppers and passerby and a group of children playing ball. There's a child that sticks out from the rest, I notice after taking a better look. There's nothing abnormal in his appearance. He's got dark hair and tan skin. He's just standing off to the side, gazing at the other kids with something wistful in his eyes - but not playing with them.

"C-Can I play too?" he asks timidly and I barely manage to hear it over the clamor of the marketplace.

The tallest boy, who is currently holding the ball to his chest, pauses. He stares at the dark-haired boy blankly, like he didn't even know he existed until a moment ago, before blinking "Sure~" he smiles, but the smile is a bit to cheerful to be genuine "But you gotta buy us a new ball first!"

I share the dark-haired boy's confusion. "Why? You got one right there?"

"Yeah, but this is _our _ball. We don't share it with kids who aren't from our group." the dark-haired boy seems crest-fallen. The kid in the blue shirt is still smiling "What's the matter, don't ya' wanna be part of our group?"

"Children can be so cruel, don't you think?" Ryuuga says suddenly, snapping my focus back to him "I want this, I want that. They hold themselves so high," He huffs "Spoiled little brats. But even they know how to use the weak - that kid has two choices, either to walk away and stay alone or to pretend and play around with his pseudo-friends that are only going to use him for their own gain - entertainment too. Neither is very appealing." he turns to you with a raised eyebrow "Which do you think is better?"

He doesn't give me a chance to answer. Ryuuga is already walking away from me and I follow, I don't want to get lost in the crowd. When I catch up to him, he's paying for something at a stall. I don't see what it is, but I don't have time to satisfy my curiosity because Ryuuga doesn't wait for anybody - and I'm already falling behind.

* * *

We set up camp near the road, the fire burning merrily between us.

"What's got you so down in the dumps?" I don't answer, and that only serves to make Ryuuga more agitated. "Hey, who are you to give _me _the silent treatment?" Ryuuga growls out, there's something challenging in his voice - something the screams of a battle cry and an itch to prove just how strong the Dragon Emperor really is. But Ryuuga does none of that. His amber eyes only hold annoyance and impatience.

He huffs "Man, you're difficult."

* * *

He dumped me. Ryuuga dumped me _in the middle of China! _I can't say I'm surprised, but seriously!

Fortunately enough I'm near the Beylin Temple, just a three days walk away. I sigh, something that seems to be becoming a habit. Glancing around the camp one last time to make sure I haven't left anything behind, I set off.

* * *

The stairs seem to be endless, because whenever I turn a corner thinking that _I'm__ finally there _- there's another hundred steps I need to climb. I'm used to a lot of physical activity, but it's still both annoying and tiresome.

When I reach the Temple, my muscles relax a bit - I've made it.

Unfortunately, I just walked into their afternoon practice. Fortunately, Mei-Mei was there to save me from being impaled with about two-hundred beys.

"So, what are you doing here in China, Tsubasa?"

It'd be easy to come up with a convincing lie, and I won't have to put a lot of effort in it since Mei-Mei is a bit more gullible than the average person. It's better than telling her about Ryuuga - he's something like a most-wanted in the Beyblade World. Somehow, it isn't worth the effort. I settle for some half-truths and leave her to assume the rest.

"And you decided to go to the Beylin Temple for your vexation?"

I smile a little "Vacation, Mei-Mei."

The Chinese girl's cheeks flush a bit at the correction. "How long will you be staying?"

The question makes me pause, before "A few days. Then I think I'll catch a plane back to Japan." Ryo could wait a bit, after all.

* * *

It's already been two days and I feel like this peace has lasted forever. The shouts and sweaty boys are a bit irritating, but then again I've survived living with both Gan Gan Galaxy and now Yuu - this is nothing compared to that. I don't exist here, I'm just a passer-by, so most people ignore me. I'm not apart of their 'group'.

"Hey, Tsubasa," Chao-Xin calls "You can paint, right?"

I raise an eyebrow at the playboy. The sight of him with brushes and paint cans dangling from his fingers, pockets and even behind his ears is quite amusing. "Um, yeah?"

Chao-Xin grins "Oh good," a second later my arms are full of paints supplies and Chao-Xin is running down the courtyard "Chi-yun is repainting a wall in the east dojo, since he's a shrimp, you gotta help him out!" he was out the gates before I can even comprehend what he said.

I blink, before sighing "Why me?"

* * *

Chi-yun keeps glaring at me, like it's my fault Chao-Xin decided to skip out on painting duty. The design is simple enough. All of the details in the picture are on the lower half of the wall, that's Chi-yun's job. My job is to paint the Yin-Yang symbol in the middle of the wall.

I've never been much of a painter, but it's not like I have any choice in the matter. Da Shan and Mei-Mei are out and everyone else is training, so I'm stuck here with this scowling chibi.

I'm halfway done with the Yang half of the symbol when a drop of black drips off my brush and onto the palette I'm holding. It falls into the white paint. I can practically feel Chi-yun glaring holes into the back of my head. I scrape it off with another paint-brush hastily, before dumping that brush into a cup of water. I swipe it around to clean the paint off, the paint swirls in a white fog in the clear liquid. When the water stills in the cup, it's full of black stains that gradually fade into gray - before both sides are the same shade.

The color reminds me of a lot of things.

* * *

Apparently, Ryo _couldn't_ wait.

"TSUBASA! WHERE IN THE NAME OF PHOENIX ARE YOU?!" Ryo bellowed over the web cam. I wince. Today is definitely not my day. And to think I was discovered just because Chao-Xin decided to flirt with some girl over the official WBBA network. "YOUR VACATION TIME WAS OVER TWO WEEKS AGO!" and even those two weeks later I still don't feel like going back to work... and facing the people that call themselves my friends. "I don't know what's up with you Tsubasa, but you're going to get back here this instant - _and if you don't I'm going to send Hikaru to drag you back!_"

I gulp, Hikaru could be formidable when she was angry - and me skipping work and leaving her to babysit the 'World's Most Childish Bladers' definitely fell under the category 'How to piss of a WBBA secretary'.

"Director?" I say meekly.

"What?"

"Do you know what the flight plan is at the nearest airport... or where the nearest airport is?"

Ryo's eyebrow twitches "You have two days before I sick Hikaru on you."

* * *

One insinuated date between Chao-Xin and the ticket lady later, I'm on the next flight to Metal City. The flight won't take that long, but I still have some time to take a nap.

I got as comfortable as I could in my seat and dozed off.

I dreamed of an aftermath of a vicious battle, betrayed faces with horror in their eyes and the sound of my own maniacal laughter.

I didn't get much sleep after that.

* * *

I'm genuinely surprised when I see Hikaru waiting at the airport - surprised and weary. She smiles wryly when she sees my reaction "Don't worry, I'm not here to lynch you." her smile turns into a frown when she tilts her head to the side "What wrong with you?"

There are so many things that she could mean by that question, but she doesn't seem afraid or even alarmed - good, she doesn't know about the darkness still lurking in my heart. If she did, I could bet my bey that Hikaru would be half-way across America by now - in hiding. Then again, Hikaru's just as oblivious to her own darkness as the others.

She doesn't make a difference between light and dark. Hikaru isn't cut into two polar-opposites, there's no light-side and no dark-side. I envie her for that.

* * *

More often than not, I find a way to get Yuu to stay at someone else's house - usually Madoka's or Kenta's. I feel a little guilty about manipulating my friends - but I'd rather do that than hurt them.

It's Saturday afternoon when a knock comes from the front door. I'm still in bed, trying to get at least a little sleep during the weekend - I get even less since the nightmares started - some were memories, and some were my own dark fantasies - both kept me awake at night.

I open the door, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes and come face-to-face with the chibi I'd just shipped off to Madoka yesterday. I blink at him for a second, but he's still there when I open them so I'm not hallucinating again. "Yuu? What are you doing here?"

Yuu's green eyes seem wider than usual, there was something shining in them, almost pleading "I wanna go home, Tsubasa." he said.

I blink, before kneeling down to Yuu's level "Yuu, what's wrong?"

"You're _what's wrong_!" I look up to see Madoka towering over me, looking every bit like an enraged, over-protective mother. The situation still hasn't registered in my mind. "Wha-?"

Madoka jabs her finger at my face accusingly "Don't you dare, Tsubasa! No more excuses! Tell us what's going on!" she demanded.

For a moment I'm tempted to tell her that I _don't_ know what's going on, but a small, pitiful sound stops me. "Tsubasa," Yuu whines miserably "Tsubasa what's going on?"

Yuu's tearing up.

My eyes widen at the sight. "Yuu," I whispers, putting a hand on the smaller boy's shoulder. Without hesitation, Yuu launches himself into my arms, hugging me like I might disappear if he let go. Madoka had gone silent in the background. "Shhh, it's okay Yuu." I don't know if it is, I don't know what this is about - did they find out? Oh God, they found out! No, no they didn't. They wouldn't be asking if they did.

My mind reeled. I lowered my chin to the top of Yuu's head "Yuu?" I say soothingly. Yuu hiccuped in response. "Yuu, you wanna tell me what this is all about?"

There was an audible gulp "You don't wanna take care of me anymore, do you Tsubasa?" Yuu hiccuped again "That's why you keep sending me to Kenchi and Madoka and, and - you wanna get rid of me!" with those words Yuu began to blubber.

I knelt, shock-still for a couple of seconds as the crying intensified. I shook myself out of my stupor "No... no, no, _no! _That's not it at all, Yuu! What gave you that idea?!"

Yuu sniffed into my shirt, still clinging to me "But you don't want me to stay with you anymore. I know I annoy you sometimes and I, I - please let me stay Tsubasa! I wanna stay here! I promise I'll be good, and I won't spend so much money on candy and I'll help clean up and, and I can wash the dishes! Just please Tsubasa, please let me stay!"

There was one part of me that kept insisting, or rather, hoping, this was just a nightmare hauled up from the Dark Power's cruel imagination - the other part knew that this hurt too much to not be real "Shhh, it's okay you. I don't want you to go away. I promise. You can stay here." I sooth, soft and comforting, while rubbing circles on Yuu's shoulder.

Yuu hiccups "Really?"

I gulp "Yeah,"

* * *

The three of us spent the rest of the day together. After I tucked Yuu into bed, something I rarely ever did since Yuu insisted that 'he was not a kid', which only proved how much I had upset him - something I was feeling extremely guilty over.

Madoka wasn't going to let me of the hook however. She cornered me in the living room after Yuu had fallen asleep. "What were you thinking?" she demanded, but she didn't raise her voice like I knew she would have liked - she didn't want to wake Yuu.

"I-"

"And before you ask what this is about, you know very well what this is about!"

I do. I knew all to well, but you don't, Madoka.

"I don't know what's been bothering you these past few months, but you need to snap out of it! I've left the issue alone, thinking you'd just brood over it like you usually do - but now you've gone too far!" Madoka's cheeks were beginning flush with fury. "How could you?! How could you send Yuu away?! DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THAT KID WORRIES FOR YOU?!"

I clasp my hand over Madoka's mouth, straining my ears for any sound that would indicate that Yuu was awake. There were none.

Madoka glared at me, but followed as I led her out of my flat, down the stairs and out into the street. I knew she couldn't keep quiet.

When we were out, standing just on the edge of the side-walk, Madoka stopped abruptly "Do you remember when you went to Hokkaido?" she says bluntly and I had to rack my brain to figure out where this abrupt topic change led. Hokkaido - oh, Hokkaido.

"Yeah, I remember." I confirmed. It was a mission I went on before the World Championships. There were rumors Dark Nubela was reforming under a new leader on Hokkaido, Ryo had wanted me to go and investigate it - infiltrate it under a false identity, if it was necessary. The rumors turned out to be false, thank Goodness, but it was still rated as a very dangerous mission at the time.

"Yuu waited for you with Ryo and Hikaru, you know? She tried to take him home, but he wouldn't budge. In the end, she called me." I know Yuu had been living with Madoka at that time, most bladers had spent some time living in Madoka's workshop - why she didn't open a business by making the extra rooms a mini-motel, I don't know. Probably so she wouldn't have to deal with more always-hungry, happy-go-lucky and hyperactive troublemakers. "When I got there, it was already past his bed time. He still didn't want to leave. He was worried that Dark Nubela would catch you, hurt you." she smiled slightly "He's such a sweet kid."

I had to agree with her on that. Yuu maybe a chatter-box, hyperactive and would grind on my nerves on a daily basis - but he was a good kid.

"You should take care of him."

I was, but she couldn't understand that. I couldn't take care of him like he used to.

"I can't."

"Sending him back to me will only upset him more!" Madoka snapped, before her blue eyes softened ever so slightly. "Why are you hurting him?"

"Answer me!" Modaka's voice is shrill, demanding and just a little desperate "Why?!"

If only I could tell her. But then I'd lose everything. I may be selfish, but more than anything, I don't want to be alone again.

"I can hurt him in worse ways, Madoka. I'm just choosing the lesser of two evils." I can see that Madoka still isn't satisfied, that she's even more confused, but the world wasn't built to please a little girl's curiosity. Good intentions could have catastrophic consequences, I've learned that all too well.

* * *

I am selfish.

I want to keep my friends, even though there's a high chance I'd end up hurting them.

I am deceitful and manipulative.

I've tricked enough people in my life to know what kind of lies to feed a particular kind of person. I knew which strings to pull, which card to throw. I know how to be subtle about it, too, keep my intentions hidden.

What are my intentions now, anyway?

I knew I couldn't keep dragging myself on like this. The borders between me and my darker self were beginning to blur, and it was getting that much harder to discern on which side I stood at.

It was like the water in that cup at the Beylin Temple, clear and translucent until the mass of black and white paint invaded it, clashing and mixing until the colors became one again - until the liquid in the cup wasn't clear, but an uneven mix of two polar-opposites that tainted and clashed with each other until simmering into the water. It will never be clear again.

There weren't any halves that made a whole anymore, just a whole.

There was only gray. Dull. Dark. Bleached. Gray.

It was a foreign darkness, an almost inherent one. The Dark Power. Greed. Pride. Envy. Corruption. What was the difference? It seemed to be an inherent darkness to all of humanity. Mine just decided to adopt a shape and a voice - my face, my voice.

Where do I stand now? What brand do I wear? Good? Evil?

Not Black. Not White. Just somewhere in between.

* * *

Review, pretty please with a cheery on top!


	2. The Beginning of the End

AN: I don't know what rabid plot bunny possessed me to write this - actually, I kinda do. Anyway, I want to see what you guys think about this chapter before deciding the fate of this fic, if you guys like it, I might continue this (though updates will be pretty spontaneous) - so don't forget to review at the end!

* * *

The Beginning of the End

I've long pasted the point of no return.

It's been three moths now. Three months since the Dark Power was awakened once again within me. Three months since I've started distancing myself from my friends. Two, since meeting Ryuuga and my stay at the Beylin Temple. One, since Yuu went to live with Madoka.

I want to bang my head against the table in frustration – how could I have let this happen?

There's a big part of me that just wants to blame Ryuuga for everything, since he did abandon me after agreeing to help me. But, just like always, I have to do everything by myself. Typical.

* * *

My limbs feel like they're made of lead, my eyelids are too heavy, and my heart is too numb. I live in this little apartment of mine as though there is no outside world, no responsibility or other people. It's a miserable existence.

The doorbell rings once, twice – before I realize that the person is too persistent to ignore. I sigh in exasperation, before making my way to the front door. I open it warily, peeking through the gap – the person pushes it open from the other side. The sudden movement throws me off balance and I fall backwards. When I look up, Gingka is staring down at me.

"O-oh, h-hey Tsubasa." Gingka greets nervously. He gulps, trying to swallow his apprehension. "Um, Tsu-Tsubasa, I have to ask you something."

Dread instantly fills my stomach. Whatever he's going to ask, I know I won't be able to answer honestly. I hastily get to my feet, but Gingka takes little notice of my panic over his own distress.

"Tsubasa, what's going?" he demands. Gingka's voice is determined, stronger but I can still hear a slight undertone of apprehension. "Why have you been ignoring us? Why have you locked yourself up in here like some kind of criminal?" If only Gingka knew the irony behind those words. But Gingka, like Yuu, honestly doesn't know what's going on. Madoka, Ryo and Hikaru can guess – but it's never the right answer, because no one wants it to be.

I take a deep breath, trying to calm myself. "Gingka, please don't act like – " he doesn't even let me finish.

"Like what? A five-year-old?" Gingka bristles "Did Yuu really annoy you that much?"

It's like Gingka just poured salt on an open wound.

"N-No, it's not like that." I say, trying to hide just how much that comment had actually hurt.

"Then why? Why are you doing all of this?" the statement reminds me of all the times Gingka's used it on some psychopathic maniac bent on ruling the world.

He asks question after question, shots accusation after accusation – and I manage to not let anything slip while I stumble over my words.

My breathing is erratic; my heart is beating so fast that it's almost painful. Gingka just keeps staring at me. His hazel eyes are misty, desperate.

"Why won't you talk to us anymore? Aren't we friends?" Something inside me breaks at the last word.

I push him over the threshold.

When I slam the door shut, I see the light tears tricking down his cheeks as the gap closes. I lean on the door for support, before slowly sinking to the floor. I lean on the hard wood, wishing the stinging in my eyes would just go away.

The leering parody of my face emerges from the darkness. I expect it to grin wickedly, to mock me as I cry over a friendship I might have just torn to shreds. Instead, it tills its' head, looking for all the world like an old man remembering a better time in his life.

"Life is cruel, isn't it?"

My shoulders shake, the shadows dance in my vision and I can't help but agree.

* * *

I push the shopping cart towards the cash register, going over the groceries to make sure I haven't forgotten anything. I haven't. When I turn the corner of the aisle, I see the line at the cash register – it isn't very long. A familiar face is standing at the end of it.

Benkei grins "Hey Tsubasa."

I smile back, it's a bit strained, but Benkei doesn't seem to notice "Hey Benkei."

I try to look anywhere but at him, my eyes sweep over his cart "You're planning a barbecue?" I asked, a little curious.

"Wow, how did you know, did you use some supper spy technique or...?"

I cut him off before he can begin blabbing "The stakes were a dead giveaway."

"Huh?" he looks at his full cart before smiling sheepishly "Yeah, I guess they were. Madoka's planning a barbecue since Yuu's been feelin' kinda down. You won't know why, would ya'?

I hesitate ever so slightly before answering "Ugh, I think I maybe have an idea." I'm surprised Madoka hasn't ranted to the entire city about me being a terrible guardian for Yuu. That either means she doesn't want to remind Yuu of why exactly he's staying with her, or Benkei just doesn't understand the severity of the situation.

"Really?" Benkei sounded genuinely surprised "Then you should come! You're like his big brother, he'd be thrilled!" he pauses abruptly, as if he just remembered something "Why aren't you living together anymore, by the way?"

"I have some... business to take care of with the WBBA. It's pretty time-consuming with all the missions Ryo's been handing out, he seems a bit paranoid about something." It's true, to a certain degree – certainly enough to satisfy Benkei.

"Huh, really? Well, I still hope you make it! It's kinda strange when we're all there but you – even though you're the quiet, background type – Madoka sure could use some backup when we're being silly... and we need someone to hold her back."

He laughs, and I find myself chortling too.

It's nice; to act like everything's normal. Benkei's too naïve to suspect anything from a friend, and I'm glad for that.

* * *

In the end, I don't go to the barbecue. I can't face Madoka – or, more importantly, Yuu. I can't face Gingka either. I don't want to hear Madoka's accusing shouts, or Yuu's confused, pleading eyes – I had never wished for him to feel unwanted, he's like a little brother to me. I can't stand the though of hurting him – of hurting anybody. And then there's Gingka. The red-head hasn't tried to talk to me again, which is troubling in itself. Gingka is the most out-going, determined person I know. For him to avoid me would mean I hurt him pretty badly when I shoved him out of my apartment.

I can't face them - not now, not yet.

* * *

My heavy footfalls echo loudly in the empty hallway.

I'm on my way to meet the Director, since he seems to be displeased with me "slacking off". Hikaru sounded nervous when she called me over the phone, so it must be bad.

I'm on the top floor, one corner away from my destination when I stumble upon Dynamis. The mystic smiles when he sees me. "Hello, Tsubasa." he greets politely. During the time since we've met, we've never interacted much. He was always more interested in the Legendary Bladers.

I smile tiredly. I'm glad that Dynamis doesn't comment about the dark circles under my eyes. "Hey there Dynamis. What are you doing here? I thought you were in Africa." Indeed, it is strange to see the Guardian of Mist Mountain so far away from home. He must have a reason – and his reasons almost always spell trouble for everyone.

Dynamis snickers, like he just guessed what I'm thinking about. "Don't be so suspicious, Tsubasa. People might think you're hiding something." I feel my blood drain from my face. Oh no, oh please – "Anyway, I merely came to inform the Chosen Bladers of a disturbance in the constellations. Director Hagane has arranged for me to meet them here tomorrow." Dynamis pauses, looking thoughtful for a second. He looks as though he's debating if he should tell me or not, like I'm not important enough to be worthy of such information. "You are welcome to come as well."

I nod, careful to keep a neutral face. My thoughts have gotten darker and more melancholic with every passing day. At least I haven't lost control yet – the 'yet' makes me think of myself as a ticking time-bomb. Dynamis sighs "It seems night will soon be upon us." Another thing about Dynamis, he likes metaphors – so it's sometimes hard to figure out how much he knows about something, his flippant attitude makes it even harder.

"Well, I must be off." He says, descending down the hallway I've just walked through. I clench my fists, trying to contain the spark of anger that Dynamis had ignited. _Why was I never good enough?!_ I bang my fist at the wall.

* * *

Ryo is _not_ in a good mood when I arrive in his office – neither am I, to say the least. Whatever Dynamis has come here for, it was troubling enough to unsettle the Director – then again, I haven't seen the man for a while, it could be something else.

"Where have you been?" he says it as though he's interrogating me. "Do you know how many of _your _assignments I had to delegate to other agents?! What's wrong with you Tsubasa?!"

I stay quiet, Ryo sighs. "Look, if you're afraid you'll mess up or something, I can sympathize – but you can't just dump your responsibility on others." I don't know what to say to that.

"Hey, are you even listening to me Tsubasa?" I avoid his gaze. I'm ashamed of my actions, even though it seems to be the most painless – for now. What else can I do? Tell them? No, that won't do – they'd just put me in mental hospital, and probably lock me up somewhere too. I don't want to feel that kind of betrayal, but I don't want to betray them either.

Ryo is still ranting "And do you know how much complaints I'm getting for all the extra work? And Gingka and Yuu don't seem to be fully focused on beyblading anymore. And now Dynamis, it's just one thing after another." he rattles on about his problems, as if I don't have my own.

I'm his subordinate, so I have to listen to what he says – whether I like it or nor.

Slowly the topic drifts back to me and Ryo begins pouring his frustrations out – saying that my absence from work is causing all the problems in the WBBA industry, how the entire beyblading community seems to suddenly want to play mother hen with me (China's former team especially) and how I should learn that life isn't all butterflies and rainbows and that I have to work for my place in world. Ryo exaggerates just as much as his son does, like I'm to blame for everything that's gone wrong in the world.

I growl under my breath, why am I here if all I ever do is get yelled at?

"...so stop being _useless _and-" I never let him finish. I don't want hear this! I'm not worthless – why can't you see that?!

The shadow dance on the walls again, the atmosphere is swallowed up by a menacing rage and I just want Ryo and his heartless words to _disappear_.

When I wake up covered in ruble in the Director's ruined office, Ryo standing protectively over a terrified Hikaru, who is cowering in a corner, I realize that it's me I wish would disappear. I look around frantically, surveying the damage I had caused – there isn't much, just a damaged office, two wary and terrified pairs of eyes and a broken trust. I hear sirens and alarms going off all over the building.

I feel hot tears swarm my eyes. I can't look at them anymore.

I run.

* * *

I've long past the point of no return.

I can't turn back anymore and what's done is done. It's time for the darkness to disappear from the face of the Earth. No one wants me here anymore, anyway.

I've managed to escape Metal City. I decide to stay at a motel in a small town, because Ryo knows it would never be my personal choice and thinks that I'm too unstable to be around other people. Maybe I am, but for now I just want a warm bed and a roof over my head – even if it's only for one night.

The room spins and my stomach lurches, and for the first time in the couple of hours since my outburst, everything comes crashing down on me. The confusion. The anger. The betrayal. Accusing stares and frightened eyes and broken friendships shadowed by my own inner turmoil.

I want to cry. I feel sick.

My stomach lurches again and bile rises up my throat. I end up emptying the meager contents of stomach into the toilet.

Hot tears slide down my face and I curl myself into a tight ball on the cool floor. I feel like the world is going to end.

* * *

The next day is gloomy. I lay in my bed with no real wish to get up – but I have to, least the WBBA catches up with me and locks me up somewhere. It's the right thing to do, after all – but who ever said "right" was fair? I'm certainly not going to just sit quietly in some mental hospital while the rest of the world hopes my Dark Power doesn't posses me again.

I beat the Dark Power once, who's to say I can't do it again? Okay, even _I'm _skeptical about my capabilities of doing something like that again.

I leave my room somewhere in the early afternoon, intent on continuing my journey – _"You're running" _a voice chimes in my head _"Why don't you stop playing hide and seek and face them? I can help you with that, you know-"_ I shake my head, dispelling the invading thoughts. Those whispers are steadily growling louder ever since my outburst in Ryo's office, and it's getting harder and harder to ignore them. They do have a point, after all.

An unwelcome sight greets me in the motel's shabby lobby. The lobby itself is nearly empty (the sign "out for lunch" placed on the receptionist's desk), save for one person. An all too familiar trench-coat wearing maniac is sitting by the motel's entrance. Ryuuga notices me before I can find an escape route and smirks that oh so annoying smirk he's so fond of.

I sigh, admitting defeat, and walk over to him.

"Hiya Tsubasa."

I decide to skip the pleasantries, besides, if Ryuuga's here he's here for a reason and I'd rather not spend more time with the ex-Dragon Emperor than necessary "What do you want?" I huff impatiently.

Ryuuga smirks widens "I see life as a runaway is treating you well." he says, looking around the dingy lobby. I can tell my situation amuses him. Then, suddenly, his expression grows dark. "I have a... favor to ask of you." It's clear by the glint in his eyes that he won't accept "no" for an answer.

"Does the line "Night will be upon us" ring any bells?" he says just as suddenly.

I blink, wracking my brain, before an answer comes to mind. "Dynamis said that."

"Yeah, no kidding." Ryuuga sniffs in disdain "I've met too many fortune-telling loons, but unfortunately, this one keeps hunting me down." I snort at the mental image. Ryuuga glares at me. There's an awkward moment.

"So, what do you want?" because he _still _hasn't told me. I honestly don't care what it is, and I have no desire to help him – why should I? He left me to fend for myself when I needed _his _help. Briefly, I contemplate trying to run – but, when I think about it, being chased by a giant, fire-breathing bey-spirit isn't too appealing.

Ryuuga raises an eyebrow, as if the answer is obvious. "Your cooperation." In his opinion, it seems that it is.

I suppress the urge to face-palm "With what, you genius?" A second later I'm on the ground. Ryuuga's holding me down with one arm, while the other is raised above his head, ready to strike. "Don't ever mock me, Tsubasa." He hisses in my ear "And don't you dare undermine my authority – I'm stronger than you, and you owe me."

I wince, trying to shift under the crushing pressure on my wrists "For what?"

"For the Dark Power."

My eyes widen "You never got rid of it." I whiz out.

"I never meant to." He stared at me then with the same expression of disdain he had on before. "With or without it, you're weak. Tell me, do you think everything will be just fine and dandy if you didn't have it." His free hand grabs my jaw, forcing me to look at him "The Dark Power doesn't choose just anybody. Why do you think no one else I defeated got infected? They feared its' power, you wanted it. Now that you have it, I suggest you use it."

I snort "For what?"

Ryuuga scowls menacingly "For whatever I tell you to use it for." he growls.

Ryuuga has power because he isn't tied down to anything; because he doesn't involve himself with other people emotionally; because he doesn't care about what others think of him, as long as he's content – because he is truly and absolutely free. Me? The shards of my heart are still embedded in the friends I've left behind, the friends that surely must hate me now. I'm weak, because I've put myself in a situation where running – from my friends and from myself – is the only thing I still have strength enough to do.

"You're pathetic." Yes, yes I am – but I certainly am not going to say that out loud, in front of Ryuuga, of all people!

After a few more seconds, the pressure on my wrists is lifted and Ryuuga stands up. I sit up, rubbing my sore wrists. Ryuuga gives me an annoyed glare "Well, ya' coming?" there's no reason to add a "or not", since I realize he fully intends to drag me with him whatever my answer may be.

I sigh in exasperation, before standing up. "Just wait until I check out." Ryuuga gives me another annoyed look, before stalking off. Some twenty minutes later, the receptionist comes back and I hand her the keys back to her and pay.

Ryuuga is waiting for me outside, his scowl still in place. "Took your time." he says irritably, before pushing himself off the wall he'd been leaning on and walking down the street. I roll my eyes, before following.

"Care to tell me what _exactly _do you need me for?" I ask when were already on a path outside the town.

"You're my subordinate now; I don't have to tell you anything." Ryuuga replies before picking up his pace, so he's walking in front of me instead of beside me.

I stop in my track, irritated "Wow, wow, wow – who said I agreed to...whatever scheme you're up to."

"Didn't I just tell you _not to mock me?_" his tone makes me flinch, so it's a good thing his back is to me – otherwise, I stand my ground.

"Fine, what's you're master plan?"

This makes him pause, if only to throw me a menacing glance over his shoulder "Are you a masochist or something?"

I just raise an eyebrow at him. Does he really think I'll do whatever he says if he decides to bully me? Yeah, let's pretend that would actually work.

Now that we're away from the town, alone where no one can eavesdrop on us, he snarls and I know he'd rather not tell me yet – but it's obvious that he has to. "The moon-loon had _another _prediction of Nemesis."

My eyes widen in shock "You think someone is going to revive Nemisis? Who?"

He huffs "Someone who's stupid enough to think he can control him, obviously."

I massage the bridge of my nose in frustration "Give me a name, Ryuuga."

Ryuuga smirks arrogantly "I'll give you three guesses."

I frown, listing the first few people who come to mind "Pluto? Rago?"

"Bingo." Ryuuga confirms "I don't know what happened to Rago, it's like he's disappeared off the face of the Earth."

I raise an eyebrow "You think he's out of the picture?"

"Maybe. But we shouldn't lower our guard yet, he might be laying low." Ryuuga turns around then, and we resume our trek.

I nod "And Pluto?"

"There quite are a few rumors going 'round about him recruiting. I've managed to figure out his pattern, so we're going to the next city he'll be in."

"And where would that be?"

"Greece."

"You're kidding me."

"Nope."

I stop again, Ryuuga doesn't. "You do realize that the WBBA _will _catch me the moment I set foot in any Japanese airport, right?"

"Ah, but we won't be going to a _Japanese _airport, we're going to a _Chinese _one! We're taking a boat to China first." Okay, that makes sense. I realize then that he isn't slowing down and hurry after him. "That actually sounds like a good idea." I murmur to myself. Unfortunately, Ryuuga heard it. This time I was ready when his fist came flying towards my face. I duck, backing away from him before he can take another swing at me "I took your advice Ryuuga, I won't be lowering my guard any time soon."

Ryuuga looks annoyed, but doesn't try anything else "Huh, whatever." He nonchalantly, like nothing had really happened.

I sigh, accepting that I'm doomed to his company for the time being "I still don't get what you need me for."

"I want you to spy on Pluto. When we find him, you're going to do some acting and convince him you're on his side."

"And how am I supposed to do that? And, if you've forgotten, it's common knowledge that I'm a spy for the WBBA now, after the Dark Nubela uncovered me."

Ryuuga sighed in exasperation "You fail to remember one tiny detail, Tsubasa. You _aren't _a spy anymore. You're a fugitive in the eyes of the WBBA. They're you enemy now." he smirked "Which makes our little act all the more believable."

"And why should I help you?" I ask "When I came to you for help, you abandoned me in China. Tell, why shouldn't I return the favor?"

He glares at me "You wouldn't dare." he hisses, voice taking on a threatening note.

I return the glare "I'm not afraid of you Ryuuga, not anymore."

"Oh?" he arches a brow "And why not?"

There are a lot of reasons. I saw how traveling with Kenta had affected him, and the fact he had been willing to help us during the Nemesis crisis proved that. In the end, all I say is "You're not the same Dragon Emperor you were at Battle Bladers."

He snorts, but lets the topic drop "Tsubasa, tell me, those twerps you call friends – do you think you betrayed them when you didn't tell them of the Dark Power's return?"

I pause, hesitating "If I told them, _they _would have been the ones to betray _me_."

Ryuuga nods "And, since you "betrayed" them, I'm guessing you have no qualms about leaving them at Nemesis' mercy." An unreadable expression covers his features "We both know they won't be prepared, they barely beat him the first time."

I chuckle softly, but it's dry and there's no real humor behind it "So, you plan to be the good guy for once, Ryuuga?" the teen in question just scowled.

And so, your unlikely partnership began.

AN: Do you remember what I said at the beginning? Like it? Love it? Hate it? Review please!


	3. Alone

AN: Firstly, I'd like to thank everyone who reviewed last chapter. Also, a review reply to my two anonymous reviewers: **Yue-chan 3** (no worries, I'm glad you liked it!) and **somebody **(both of your reviews made my day, thank you so much!) I'm a bit frustrated that this turned out so short(yeah, school is a major player in short chapters), so I'll try to make the next one longer!

...

Alone

International flight was a tiring affair. Though I would have usually slept on the plane, I was uneasy with the idea of sleep while Ryuuga sat next to me. Because, honestly, I don't even want to consider what he could and would do to me then – better not risk it.

We landed in Athens some odd twelve hours later. I'm sore and tired, Ryuuga is positively cranky.

"C'mon, we gotta catch a bus from here." he announces when we've gotten off the plane. We don't have to pick up any luggage, since we don't have any. The few belongings I have with me are stashed in the backpack on my back. I don't know where Ryuuga keeps his.

"Which one?" I ask curiously, since he _still _hasn't told me where _exactly _we're going.

"The one we can afford."

I groan "Ryuuga, did you actually think this through?"

"Off course I did!" he snaps, then he tips his head to the side, asking "What's wrong with you? You're in a worse mood than usual."

_You're one to talk, _no, better not voice that if I want to keep my head on my shoulders. I shrug "If you were wondering what's wrong with me, the maniacal voice in my head has your answer." I say dryly.

Ryuuga rolls his eyes, but I still hear him chuckle.

* * *

The town is a small, agricultural place and forests of olive trees surround it on all sides. It's a peaceful place, located on one of the many islands of Greece.

I have absolutely no idea what a psychopath like Pluto could be doing here. I voiced my thoughts to Ryuuga, but he just snorted and told me to keep my thoughts to myself.

He's on the look out, and a little on edge so I hold my tongue – it would be _very_ stupid to do otherwise.

We've come a few days earlier than Pluto, at least what we hope is few days earlier.

There's a small inn in the town center and that's where we'll stay until Pluto arrives – at least where _I'll _be staying.

"What do you mean your leaving?!" I demand.

"Exactly that." Ryuuga deadpans.

"But _why_?" I exclaim, and a little exasperation seeps into my tone "Aren't we in this together?"

"Is it just me, or is this conversation starting to sound like a breakup?"

"Ryuuga! Answer the question!"

He sighs in annoyance "When the hell did you get so bossy?" I just glare, he sighs again, but eventually he gives in "This is a pretty small place. When you meet Pluto, it's going to look suspicious enough. He's going to ask around, see when you came here, why, what were you doing _and _who you were with. Does it not make sense to make myself scatter?"

"Oh," and honestly, I should have thought of that sooner. I don't know why I got so used to the idea of me _and _Ryuuga – Ryuuga, of all people! – being partners on this mission. Huh, I guess I'm really missing my friends – if they still think of me as a friend, which is highly questionable. I don't want to be alone, I realize, even if the only person to keep me company is this white-haired manic.

Unfortunately, Ryuuga seems to have caught on to my train of thought. He pouts "Aw, what's the matter? Little Tsu-chan, doesn't want to be alone?" that tone makes my grind my teeth.

I force myself to turn around, before I can do something I might come to regret later.

"Fine. Go. See if I care."

But still, I wouldn't _mind _to have someone to pull me out if the water gets too deep.

* * *

I'm nervous. I'm so going to blow this. _Pull it together idiot. _I force my feet forward and try to hide the tension in my shoulders. I stroll down the street at what I hope is a leisurely pace. Ryuuga had left before even setting foot in the town and I haven't heard from him since. The only thing we really did discuss was means of communication between us once I infiltrate Pluto's organization, and even that was brief.

I pause in my walk to examine some apples at a nearby stall. The small town market is packet today, for whatever reason. I've been looking around for the last hour or so. Pluto is due today, so I figured he'd begin recruiting at the most populated place in town. Judging by the guy that's been following me for the last ten minutes, I'd say I was right.

I buy two apples before heading back to the motel, the stalker follows.

I put on the act of being oblivious to his presence. Two streets away from the motel, I took a shortcut through an alley – he sees his opportunity then.

"Well, well, well, if it isn't one of the Legendary Blader's lapdogs." my temper spikes at being called a lapdog, but I ignore my indignation. I swirl around on my heel, acting for all the world like I hadn't known he had been stalking me ever since I left the market.

"What are you doing here, Pluto?" if I act like a self-righteous idiot, this might actually work.

He sniffs, as if disappointed "Ah, always the same question." Yup, fell for it like a rock.

"Well?" I prompt. At the same time I'm seizing him up. He's got a pretty decent disguise. His face is hidden behind a shawl and a winter hat, and his figure masked by that thick cloak, hunched over and leaning on a crane like that, most people wouldn't bother to look twice at what they thought was a harmless old man.

"Heh, like I'm gonna tell you." He grins suddenly, the kind of grin that makes unpleasant shivers run down your spine "But what are _you _doing here? Last I heard, your little _friends _were looking everywhere for you," he pauses, and there's a sadistic gleam in his eyes "or should I say _hunting you down_."

My wince isn't faked, that had definitely hit a nerve – hard.

"I, ugh, um," I stammer and he looks amused. The plan is going perfectly, for now. "None of your business." I say finally, but it lacks any real bite – I sound defeated, even to my own ears.

Pluto quirks an eyebrow, he still seems to be taking much more pleasure in this than I'm comfortable with "Oh, really?" he asks curiously.

I nod, a little uncertain, and he smirks "And what if I... made it my business?"

I shift uneasily, fidgeting slightly "What are you talking about?"

He chuckles "Poor, poor Tsubasa." I really do _hate _it when people call me that. "Somehow, you always end up betrayed, trapped," he sticks his crane under my chin "Alone."

Yes, always so alone.

"Come with me," Pluto says softly, almost gently "And I may remedy that."

The plan worked perfectly, and yet it doesn't feel like a victory at all.

* * *

The office is a dark, dreary place, but I can't say I expected any better – Pluto's last hideout was a _cave _after all.

"This is your first assignment." He says, pushing a file over the desk in front of him.

I scrutinize it for a second, as if expecting all the secrets it holds to just pop out, before opening it. My eyes widen when I see the name written on the top of the page. "I believe you are well acquaintanced with him. After all, Julian Conzern is one of a kind." Pluto smirks, and it reminds me all too much of Ryuuga for me not to squirm slightly.

"As is his bey."

* * *

Rome is a beautiful city, filled with breath-taking architecture and fascinating history (and good food). On the outskirts of this grand city, sits the villa of the Conzern family. It's a ginormous mansion, impressive in it's own right, as are the gardens that stretch out across property, to the edge of the forest behind the villa.

This is where my target resides.

One of Pluto's spies, poising as a maid at the Conzern family villa, had gotten hold of Julian's schedule. He has a two-hour pause before lunch, which he often uses to go horse-back riding in the vast gardens and forest. I've watched him for a couple of days, so I've memorized the route he takes the most – and besides, there's a fork in the road in the forest path that he has to pass for any route he wants to take.

My heart feels heavy, but I have to do this if I am to acquire Pluto's trust.

My phone vibrates in my pocket – it's a new one, since I had to destroy the old one so the WBBA couldn't track me. "He's left the stables." the slightly Italian ascent drifts out of the receiver. My shoulders tense and I swing the phone shut. Julian will be here soon, I have to be ready.

Sure enough, a few minutes later, a familiar blonde comes trotting down the dusty path on top a beige horse. I can't help but stare for a moment, because it's the most relaxed state I've ever seen Julian Conzern in. His expression isn't as serious or aristocratic as I've grown used to it being, and his eyes aren't as cold or calculating – he looks genuinely relaxed, genuinely _happy_.

Well, his guard is down, at least. My lips thin in determination and I pull the rope I had been holding. It's ties to a tree at the other side of the path and effectively knocks Julian off his stead when I pull it taunt in midair.

He blonde hits the ground with a _thud_ and a cloud of dust. He sits up with a small moan.

Show time.

I chuckle "Well, that was easier than I thought." I say, just laud enough for him to hear.

Julian is back on his feet a second later, looking around wildly. "Who's there?!" he demands. All traces of that serene peace long gone. Sad, I preferred it over his usual, refined manner.

"You don't remember me?" I huff, feigning indignation "But everything is exactly how it was two years ago, when we first met face to face!"

Julian's sapphire eyes widen, and I'm pleased to see the color drain from his face "Tsubasa?" the name is almost inaudible, spoken with such an uncertainty that I actually doubted if it had really come from the great Julian Conzern.

I smile. "Ah, and here I was thinking that you had forgotten me."

I slide off the branch I had been sitting on, landing gracefully on the grass a few feet away from him. His face has bleached even more, but the shock doesn't last long because soon he shakes his head and his eyes harden. "What are you doing here?" he asks in a level tone, but I know his calm is forced.

I frown petulantly "Well this is certainly a warm welcome."

"What are you talking about?!" Julian snaps "You're a fugitive now! What were you expecting?"

I look away at that point, because, really, he just _had_ to bring that up. "I-" I hesitate "A friend." I say finally, raising my gaze to meet his pleadingly "Maybe."

Those words had more effect than I had hoped for, because suddenly Julian's stance isn't as half as aggressive, but his eyes are still guarded. "You didn't answer my question. What are you doing here?"

I look away again, not because it's part of my act or anything, but because I genuinely can't look at him. "It," I gulp "it doesn't matter. I have to go!" I turn and run, he follows.

"Tsubasa, wait!" _No, no, _no_! Run _away_ idiot! Don't you see a trap when it's staring you in the face! _I want to shout at him, but then everything will be ruined and I'm almost positive someone is watching us, ready to report my every move to Pluto. There's no turning back, I _have_ to do this.

We reach a clearing not far from the forest path. The earth is bare here, perfect for a bey battle. I spin on my heel, taking out my launcher in the process and fire my Earth Eagle at Julian. His face registers shock, then something akin to hurt – I guess he _does _consider me a friend, in his own way. He pivots to the right and my bey whizzes over his left shoulder.

He hits the ground with another loud _thud_ "What are you doing! Tsubasa!" he rolls over, out of the path of my circling bey, before standing up quickly.

I grin, "What? I just want a rematch!" I'm acting so much like my Darker half that it's starting to scare me. Julian is still staring at me, frowning, before his eyes wide with realization. "You're, you aren't-" Julian stammers.

I scowl. So he's figured it out, hasn't he? "Just because my eyes aren't red doesn't mean I'm a good person." I growl out. My hand hovers over my chest "We all have darkness within us."

Julian snorts, and I have a sudden urge to hit him right in that pretty face of his "What happened to you?! You're not acting like you were under the Dark Power! And neither are you acting like – "

"Like who?" I snap, and I can almost feel the red tingeing my irises. "Like _"me"?_ Well sorry pal you don't even know me! You think I'm a nutjob even when I'm not controlled by some evil entity!"

My bey whizzes towards him again, but Julian doesn't try to dodge – he's frozen "Don't assume that you know me!" Earth Eagle hits square in the shoulder, pinning him to a tree. His face scrunches up from the pain.

"Tsu-basa!" he croaks out, and I feel something in my chest give "T-tsu-basa! P-please!" all too late I realize what's happening. I call off my bey, and it returns to normal, though I hardly notice. My eyes are locked on the figure slumped at the base of the tree, his head resting on the roots covering the ground, unconscious.

I feel panic surge through my veins – no, what have I done?

I dash over to him, checking him for injuries, but there's nothing too serious besides the wound on his shoulder, but it's shallow so I don't think it a cause for too much worry – though he probably hit his head pretty hard if it managed to knock him out, he might even have a concussion. I hope not, but at the same time, this might prove to be a good thing.

I gingerly reach inside one of his pockets, and my fingers brush the metallic surface of his bey. Sighing, I pull it out. The black and purple Black Excalibur gleams in the sunlight. I look at it resentfully before shoving it in my own pocket. I send one last scrutinizing glance at Julian before rushing down the way we had came from.

I walk towards the forest path from which Julian had strayed off while chasing me. Fortunately, Julian's horse is still there.

I take the horse by the rains and lead it slowly towards the meadow. It whinnies unhappily as I pull Julian's unconscious form onto its' saddle, before climbing on myself. Obviously, it isn't please by the extra raider.

Okay, now, how do you ride a horse?

I've watched Julian do it for the last couple of days, so I think I may be able to mimic it. Let me see, your feet go into the stirrups and you kick the horse's sides gently to make it move. I try that out, and I'm pleased when the horse starts walking. I stir it towards the Conzern villa. The walk is pretty slow, since I don't want to aggravate Julian's injuries.

During the whole journey, I avoid looking down at the unconscious mass thrown over the saddle in front of me.

When we're at the edge of the forest, still concealed by the shade of the trees, I slide off the horse. I pat it's neck gently, before checking that Julian won't fall off the horse when I'm not behind him. Everything's ready, so I hit it in the rump hard enough for it to get the message that it's supposed to move.

It walks slowly out of the forest and into the sunlight. I climb a nearby tree and take out my binoculars. Julian's horse had stopped some ways away to munch on some decorative bush in the garden, and soon enough one of the gardeners noticed it's presence – and, consequently, that of it rider.

Even from this distance, I could hear their shouts clearly. I smile to myself, watching until the many staff members carried Julian's unconscious form towards the villa, before climbing down and heading on my not-so-marry way.

* * *

Pluto glares at me, clearly irritated "_Why _did you do that?" he demands in a low voice, which speaks of threats and dark consequences.

I stare back, trying to hide the fact of just how much his glare unsettles me "I did what you ordered." I say simply.

"I didn't order you to carry that brat back to his mansion!" Pluto bangs his hands on his desk and stands up "What do you have to say for yourself?!"

"I did what you ordered me to." I repeat, in a tone much calmer than I actually feel "I beat Julian, I stole his bey, Black Excalibur is in your possession and I made sure he wouldn't be a threat to us." my eyes narrow "What more could you ask for?"

Pluto scowls disapprovingly "I don't _ask _, I _order_ – and it would be wise of you to remember that." He smirks suddenly, as if he's found something deathly amusing "But, I guess you're right. Besides, next time I'll make sure to send someone with more guts than you." it's a challenge, bait to rile me up – but I won't fall for it.

"I did what you ordered, but I couldn't just leave an injured person alone in a forest when no one would know where to look for him." My tone is final, bold "I took care of him, he won't bother us anymore – it was completely unnecessary to do anything else."

Pluto snorts "It was completely unnecessary to carry Prince Charming back to his Castle too." then he sighs, like he's dealing with an incompetent child and not a subordinate "I'll give you one more assignment, it'll decide how loyal you are to our cause," he stares at me for a moment, before saying "But for now, you're going to go and recruit some" he pauses, as if searching for the right word "_special _people."

My stomach crunches uneasily "What kind of _"special"?_" I ask, barely managing to keep the dread out of my voice.

"Oh, very special." Pluto laughs "Special to the Legendary Bladers that is!"

* * *

This seems all too familiar, because, in a way, it is.

The whole thing reminds me too much of my days in the Dark Nubela.

I found out that Reiji had joined Pluto a few days after the incident with Julian, since then we've been inseparable – seriously, I can't get rid of the creep! Reiji had always unnerved me, but now that feeling was amplified when the snake clung to me like a leach, most likely because Pluto ordered him to keep an eye on me, I know he still doesn't fully trust me.

By the way, Pluto is making me lug around a partner for this mission, how tiresome – but at least it's not Reiji! But it's that arrogant brat, Reiki. I'd have thought he had learned his lesson after the Dark Nubela was disbanded, but I guess some people never learn.

I groan, this was going to be a _long_ mission.

We travel to Russia first, Moscow to be precise, where we met up with Anton. It was strange to see a familiar face in a situation like this – even though Anton is a slimy git. He has resources though, and money and I know that's probably the only thing that kept him out of prison.

Pluto's budget is pretty short these days, it seemed. He's using Anton as he had once used Ziggurat – for financing his grand plan, whatever it is.

Anton doesn't drawl or taunt me as I expected, well, of everyone involved in this. Instead, he raises a thin eyebrow, before a sly smile comes over his face. "Welcome to the Dark Side." he half-joked, half-congratulated me. I get the impression that he thinks I'm very cunning to have wiggled my way back into Gingka's close circle of friends – only to betray them again. Either that or he finds it amusing how naïve the four other Gan Gan Galaxy members can be. Maybe both.

Mercifully, our flight is tomorrow, so I don't have to put up with him for long.

Anton gets us on a plane headed for Brazil, and I can already feel the dread building in my stomach even before I and Reiki set foot on it.

* * *

Argo became an underground fighter after the World Championships. I watch him go a couple of rounds in the ring, he's quite formidable.

Reiki sits next to me on one of the crates in the spacious warehouse, slurping loudly on a can of soda. Man, he's annoying... more than usual, anyway. I don't know why he even came with me. He could have just stayed at the hotel.

I'm not sure how I feel about that. On one hand, Argo could attack me – he's stronger than me physically, even though I am faster, and after what happened to Julian I'm a bit afraid of what might happen to my opponents, or anyone in a one-mile radius, really. But on the other hand, Reiki is probably here just to make sure I don't do anything suspicious – he's my watchdog. He isn't the best of company either. Then again, neither are Gingka or Masamune when they get indigestion after one of their eating contests... or Yuu when he's cranky, or Madoka when she's pissed, or Ryo when he's stressed...

Uh, why am I thinking of that, now of all times?

I wait until Argo is finished in the ring, leaving bloody noses and dark bruises in his wake. He has a look of sadistic satisfaction on his face.

It takes some effort to keep the disgusted look off my face.

"Hey, if it isn't dear little Tsubasa," he says as I approach him. What is it with people always using diminutive when they talk to me – what am I, five? I mean I'm just as tall as Ryuuga, I'm pretty mature and I don't look like a kid! Why do people insist on treating me like one? "What brings you here?" what do you _think _brought me here? Certainly not a crazy lunatic wanting to resurrect mythical evil entities – _no, _certainly not.

I keep my tongue in check though, as always. My temper has been short ever since this whole fiasco began – I just hope Argo doesn't light it. That would end badly – for everyone.

I glare, but Argo merely waves it off "I don't really care though, but I still want a rematch." Yeah, you're cruising for a bruising punk. I see an opportunity then – if I can beat him again, he might join Pluto. I'm not happy about the idea of the Garcias doing Pluto's biding, they were hard to handle under Ziggurat, how knows how much worse they would be under someone like Pluto? I have to do this though, if I don't, I'll never find the information I'm searching for.

I take a deep breath, mentally preparing myself. "I have a proposition to make." I say. The eldest Garcia raises an eyebrow. "What kind of propisitiun?" Argo asks, his Japanese is pretty bad, but then again he had no formal education, it's a miracle he can speak the language at all.

A man calls Argo across the warehouse, saying something in Portuguese. There's a pause, before Argo answers. The man's eyes stray towards me and Reiki, who is still sitting on the cart in the back (and looks ready for a fight) briefly, before he nods and exits the warehouse.

Argo and I take out our beys and launched into battle. Soon, the cheers and flying fists that were there a few minutes ago were replaced by the clashing of spinning metal on the stadium - which was more or less a giant, circular hole in the ground. We shouted attack after attack. Argo was merciless, but his technique considered mainly of a strong offence that would make no room for my own, then, when my bey's speed depleted, he'd overpower me. He should know better than to use the same strategy twice.

"Ray Gil, attack!" his bey crashes into mine, pushing it easily towards the ledge of the stadium – I let him. I grin triumphantly, and Eagle stops resisting completely, sending both itself and Argo's bey flying over the edge.

It's now or never, I'll just have to trust Ryuuga's advice. I leak a little of the Dark Power into my bey, and I feel my Dark alter-ego brush my conscience – but shove him back with as much force as I can muster. His presence made me slightly panicked, but I did not lose control.

Earth Eagle landed within the stadium, Ray Gil crashed before Argo's feet.

He stares at it, as if unable to comprehend what just happened - again - before launching into a temper tantrum "You could only beat me with cheap tricks!" Argo shouted, enraged. I felt a flame set ablaze in my chest "I always though of you as a weakling Tsubasa, but now I know you're a coward too!"

It was like a dam broke somewhere within me, and suddenly I felt all those negative emotions I had been trying to hide and suppress erupt to the surface. "WEAK?! WHO ARE YOU CALLING WEAK! YOU POOR EXCUSE FOR A BLADER!" I roar. My vision is tinged red, the world is dark and hallow and I'm angry – oh so angry that I can't contain it no longer. There are no words to describe my all-mighty rage. "YOU USE YOUR _SIBLINGS_ AS IF THEY WERE _NOTHING_ TO YOU! YOU'RE THE TRUE COWARD!" He was. Argo was lying. Argo was the coward. He deserved to suffer – to suffer for everything he did to me and put me though, for taunting me and calling me weak and reminding me of everything that I _hate._

Reiki was screaming somewhere in the background. Argo's eyes were wide with fright, mouth agape in a silent scream. I heard running from behind – but it wasn't running away from me, it was running _towards _me.

"Tsubasa, stop it!" Reiki shouted, trying to make his tone sound authoritative, but it shook uncontrollably. Good, let him wither in fear and misery – that arrogant brat deserved to bite the dust.

A hand suddenly latched onto my shoulder and I screeched. I smacked it away, spinning on the spot to face the fool who dared try to stop me. Reiki stood there, petrified. He cradled his hand to his chest as if it were burned.

"Tsubasa, you idiot, control yourself!" he seemed to realize what he had said a moment to late, but I didn't care – he said it anyway and I'm not gonna let people walk all over me just because of their arrogance.

"I-I didn't mean that!" Reiki stutters, and it's quite amusing to see his confidence shaken so badly. He's practically quacking in his boots. "I just–I, please!" he breaks off suddenly, and there's something deeply satisfying in making him beg "Please, don't do this, Tsubasa! I can't leave Dan at Pluto's mercy! Please Tsubasa, I know you're a good person!" the words, spoken in a desperate voice of an older brother, not of an arrogant boy, are as though someone had dropped a bucket of icy water over my head.

My anger vanished and horror hits me full on. How could I do this? Was I honestly considering hurting someone so much? Was I...? No, I try desperately not to believe it as fear clutches my heart. How could I? No... no, no, no, no, _no, no, NO!_

I gasp, my heart beats loudly against my ribcage, frantically, and it feels like it just might break it. Shadows dance in the corners of my vision, like some colossal wave that's inches from colliding with me. I take a step back, panicked, afraid of what I had become. I try to push the bad emotions back, seal them away in my chest and hope they never break the surface again – hope to just disappear off the face of the Earth or, better yet, to never have existed at all.

And all I can think is _monster, monster – __**monster!**_

I gasp, feeling exhausted and like someone had punched me in the gut, repetitively – actually, I would have like to have done that. It had been pretty hard, but I managed to contain most of the Darkness within me. Argo's fine, more or less, but he's pretty shaken, as is Reiki, they're not even trying to hide it.

Reiki tries smile smugly, but his expression is uncertain and his voice shaky. "If you do what our masters say, you will have this power as well." he says, but his tone doesn't hold its' usual gloating.

Argo still looks frightened, but when he hears those words it vanishes, replaced with a greedy look, though a bit of caution still remains. Common sense seems to abandon people when faced with temptation.

* * *

Tobio is in Mexico. And I have a hunch it's one of those things I don't want to know about. The guy's pretty eccentric, after all. He's been traveling from on ancient Aztec city to another, apparently.

The jungle on the south of the country is breathtaking... and full of mosquitoes.

"These damn bug will eat me alive!" Reiki whines, slapping his cheek yet again. The sight is pretty comical. I barely manage to suppress my laugher "Tsubasa, do something!" Reiki demands. It had been a mere few days since we left Brazil, traveling mainly by busses and trains, and yet he acted as though he wasn't afraid of me – which he might be, it's only natural. I guess his back to his normal, arrogant self. Good, some semblance of normality has finally returned to my life.

I raise my eyebrow "What can_ I_ do? Last time I checked, you were the one that forgot to bring mosquito-repellant."

"Erm, well, I –" he tries to cover up his embarrassment, and fails miserably. I can't help but laugh. "Here," I say, chuckling and hand him a bottle of bug-repellent "I brought a spare, just in case."

Reiki grins, a bit uncertain and I can't barely keep from staring, because it's been so long since anyone smiled such a genuine smile at me "Thanks Tsubasa." he says, but there's some remnant of fear in his eyes, a reminder of what I had done.

The rest of the trip is spent in semi-confident silence, and though I'm not as miserable as I was in the beginning, my mood is still somber.

Tobio joins us after a few days, because he claims it's the logical thing to do. I don't pay much attention; my thoughts are hazy and dim. The last few days feel like I was walking in a dream, but some nightmares were too real as well. I just hope I'll wake up soon.

* * *

When it came to recruiting, the former members of team Star-breaker were an obvious choice. Gingka and co. had already had dealings with them, so they might be a little predictable in battle, but bringing familiar faces to the battlefield again would definitely unsettle them.

I scowl. When have I begun conspiring against my friends? I shake it off and try to focus on the matter at hand.

I still can't believe Damian Hart goes to a high-school now. It seems so surreal that a person like him would lead such a normal life. I'd pretty much gotten used to him shouting "Kerbeks! Send them to their own personal hell!" and laughing like a maniac after – and people call _me_ mental. I hear he's still a jerk, though.

It occurs to me that maybe I should find Jack too, but after the American Tournament (when we we're still searching for all the Legendary Bladers) I'd say he was on the mend. He maybe still be a crazy artist, but at least he's a good guy now – or at least he's trying to be one (and I hope he'll stop trying to make a statue out of me soon). He took his chance to escape the darkness, who am I to drag him back?

Damian was pretty easy to convince, though I almost snapped his neck when he called me a girl because of my hair... okay, moving on. I think when all this is over I'll have to take care of these... um, anger issues? Yeah, easier said than done.

Damian complains like a petulant child, a rather cruel, rather arrogant one too. How did I get stuck with him again? It's like I'm babysitting Yuu, Gingka and Masamune again.

Reiki arrives at the rendezvous point some time later, a few bladers, our new recruits, trailing behind him. We send a report to Pluto, stating all the names of his new minions, our progress, and where we are headed next. We're going to do some more recruiting on the way to our next target.

* * *

Over the weeks – weeks that slowly turned to months without me noticing, this whole experience felt more or less like a dream, or a nightmare, than anything else – more people joined Pluto's cause. They were all lured in by his promise of power, they were all greedy.

I kept as much of a distance from the former Dark Nubela members as I could – except Reiji, because I couldn't get rid of him – I tried, believe me. The guy just can't take a hint. He hung around me and Reiki whenever we were back at the base, which wasn't often. Dan and Reiki spent as much time as they could together when it so happened that they were both at headquarters, now situated in Anton's manor in Russia (which often left me alone with Reiji). Pluto had forced the twins into this, thinking they'd be useful in the fight against the Legendary Bladers – though I doubt anyone will be more useful than me, as much as I am loath to admit it.

"C'mon," Reiki grunted, his eyes wary of things to come, but he still tries to convince me "You've put this off long enough."

I look at the baige envelope sorrowfully, wishing, not for the first time, to erase the words written there from existence - it was a death-sentence for my friends, the key to their downfall. Could I really... How can I...?

A fleeting voice reaches my ears _"... I know you're a good person." _– but I'm not sure about that myself.

I nod somberly, my head bowed. "Let's go."

...

AN: Okay guys, it's late, I'm exhausted and the planet seems to be conspiring against me, so please forgive any grammar mistakes I might have missed and that it was shorter than I intended - again. Due to unfortunate events, there was a major set back in the plot, since I lost most of the notes I made - also, I don't know when the next update will be, since the plot is in shambles now and I have to patch it together somehow - so I'm open to suggestions people! Tell me what you liked, what you didn't like, what I could have wrote better and any ideas or what you'd like to see in future chapters. And congratulations for those of you who guessed right(can't remember now, want to _sleep)!_ Have a great New Year!

**AN (2): I merged chapter 3 with chapter 4, so the next one will only be an AN explaining future updates and the like - please read it though, it's important.**


	4. AN

AN: Alright. Firstly, I must apologize because this is not an actual chapter. Secondly, I have no idea when the next chapter will be updated. You see, about a week ago someone stole my phone - I keep all of my notes for my fics on it (like points in the plot and details I want include while writing). Now it's all gone, and it's unlikely I'm going to get them back, even though I desperately hope I will! In other words, I'm going to rebuild the plot from scratch - I _do _remember some detail, but some specific plot points are completely lost.

On top of that, ffnet is being a jerk and I'm having trouble accessing my account - I barely managed to get this posted! I sorely hope it's temporary though.

I'm open to suggestions concerning future chapters, so if you have any ideas or want me to include something you would really like to see in this story please tell me via PM or review.

The only other thing that I want to say is that if you've read this far, thank you and I hope you've enjoyed my writing. If you plan keep reading this fic even after reading this message then I can't put it into words how happy that makes me.

Again, thank you, and I hope we see each other soon!

~SS

PS. 'SS' _does_ not _stand for Severus Snape - even though I love the git._


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